Tonight, I watched Million Dollar Listing and I saw a couple who were having a disagreement over buying a home. This struck a nerve with me. After, being in Real Estate for 12 years, and helping couples buy homes, and being in that situation myself , I thought how do people get exactly what they want when purchasing a home without it becoming World War III in a relationship?
When I meet buyers, I ask them, lets picture it is 90 days after the closing, where do you picture yourself? Describe to the smallest detail, what you see? The home, the neighborhood, everything that they are looking for. Then I inform them that they might get form 90 to 95 percent of what they are looking for. I ask them where are they bendable...One of the toughest situations is where, I ask that question and both people tell me something different. I know at that time, they have not talked or communicated their needs to each other.
I recommend that couples should sit down with a pad and an adult beverage ( I love a glass of wine) and write down what is the perfect home and then your partner see what you wrote. Ask open ended questions of each other, find out what is truly important for each one of you, when it come to the features of the home. Truly Listen! This way when you start seeing homes, you know what each other wants. One of the things, is that when a couple agrees and compromises, on what type and style of home, both people feel that they are heard and more excited about the process. I love it when both people feel at the closing that they bought a home TOGETHER!
I welcome your thoughts on this.....
Jeffrey R. Carlson
RE/MAX Masters
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